You know your in East Africa when...

1. you have a vehicle accident and after climbing out the windows the other (local) occupants congratulate the driver for only endangering their lives not actually claiming any. then the vehicle is righted and pushed out of a ditch, the exhaust system left to rust and the journey continues nothing more said.
2. the web of corruption is so vast with so many greedily out stretched hands that it becomes more cumbersome and expensive than taking the official route.
3. someone wakes you while trying to steal your pants (the ones you're wearing) on an train.
4. democratic elections incite a nationwide crime wave (collection of campaign funds).
5. the vehicle you are traveling in signals an oncoming vehicle to stop and requests the use of a window winder, only to be refused because they are also void of window winders.
6. your in a vehicle designed for at most half of its current occupants. my personal bests (people, not including cargo or children, because they don't count): Ute 32, car 12, van (low roof) 26.
7. you are referred to you by the colour of your skin and it is not racist.
8. you hear rumours like: people from the developed world (or the Global North for the PC freaks) are sponsored by their respective governments to travel; the same group are sitting on the cure to AIDS but preventing it from coming to Africa.
9. you're meeting travelers with business cards advertising themselves as travelers.
10. conversations end with a discussion about how one can emigrate from their respective countries to your country. And how they have long wanted to come to your, but i cant remember the name right now, country.
11. you're at concert and you see a policeman (in uniform) on duty swinging his semi automatic assault rifle over his back like it's a toy, sculling a beer and flirting with some local ladies. all this while clearly struggling to keep his own balance.